CelebrityFIST!

It’s a showdown between Avatar and The Hurt Locker.

Who wins? Who wins?

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THE HURT LOCKER

FUCK AVATAR

FUCK AVATAR

FUCK AVATAR

More Notes:

• Best Documentary Feature:  The Cove (too bad - I was hoping Food, Inc. would win).  Suprisingly Fisher Stevens is now an Oscar winner (he was in “Short Circuit“)
• Best Editing:  The Hurt Locker

Here’s a trailer for The Hurt Locker BTW in case you’ve been under a rock for a year.

Notes:

• T-Bone Burnett won best song
• Molly Ringwald & Matthew Broderick introduce a tribute John Hughes.  Nicely done.
• Something weird happened during the speech for Best Documentary Short.  But I’m not sure what.
• Ben Stiller comes out as one of those Avatar thingies (with tail!).  A million geeks just came.
• Star Trek wins Best Makeup - somewhere Bill Shatner is saying “THAT SHOULD BE MIIIINE!“
• Robin Williams subs for Heath Ledger for the Best Supporting Actress intros.  Interesting choice.

(more…)

Well rather than live-blogging the Oscars I’ll just be interjecting here and there with random notes … throw a bunch of celebrities your way so you won’t get bored.  And neither will I:

For example watching the red carpet here:

• Sarah Jessica Parker looks like a tanned skeleton
• Morgan Freeman looks like a pimp
• Jennifer Lopez enjoys the Oscars (especially since her label dropped her ass)
• Whoopie Goldberg tries to do a funny commercial about pissing in her pants - and fails (of course).

(more…)

Well the nominees are out for the Oscars which televise … eh, sometime later this year I’m sure.  Who cares?  Its always a boring thing anyway.  If I’m off (and I usually am) I will be LIVE blogging the sordid fest yet again.  I have a feeling I’m going to make a drinking game out of everytime someone mentions “Avatar” or “James Cameron” - which would be cool since I’m sure I’d fall asleep on the keyboard 30 minutes in.

Anyway, planning later.  Nominees now.  Here they are: (more…)

Yeah, normally, I wouldn’t put these pics up even if you put a gun to my head.  However, is an effort to keep an “open mind” (or “fractured mind” once looking at this pictures)  I decided to post them with a big DNW alert.

What could possibly be so offensive?  Easy.  Pink.  Performing at the Grammys.  In a … well … a see-thru leotard with white straps around it.  Performing what I can only assume is a Cirque De Soliel-inspired set.  I’d hunt the video but I’m afraid my testicles will permanently retract (as it is now; I’m speaking three octaves higher than normal).

So *ugh* without further ado.  Enjoy?  (Remember you WERE warned) (more…)

Julia Roberts (x1), Cameron Diaz (x1), Heidi Klum (x3, with husband Seal), Zoe Saldana (x1), Julie Benz (x1)

Kate Hudson

Mariah Carey (and her ‘talents’)

Anna Paquin (with someone who is surely NOT her dentist)

Penelope Cruz (x1), Heather Graham (x1), Stacy Ferguson (aka Fergie, x1)

*sigh* Why are people so full of shit.  (Look this is quick rant - just skip to the pics - your call)  Anyway, had one person call in on my yesterday.  Today that person showed up but ANOTHER called in.  And now I just got a call that a THIRD person is calling in tomorrow.  Why?  In each of these cases their snot-nosed brats are sick. 

Fine I’m bias - not let me bitch.  Guess what?  We all got bills.  Sucks when a kid is sick I get it - but unless you got no relatives or unless your kid got hit with a Mack truck and is in the hospital, sorry, I’m playing my “asshole” card.  Yes, I’m single.  Yes, I don’t have a regular fuck.  Yes, I know kids “are a gift from God”.

I didn’t inseminate the uterus okay?  Deal with it.

*ARGH*  Okay that’s outta the way (for now).

The Golden Globes apparently happened.  The reason I’m so on the ball with this is because there’s red carpet pics abounding on the Net.  So in my effort to continue to pretend this is a CELEB blog (and not just titty blog - which we all know it is).  Let’s post some of these pics shall we?

Jennifer Morrison

Perrey Reeves

Sofia Vergara

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Okay after the shit post earlier and the fact I gotta go asleep eventually; here’s some easy things to admire and whack off to.

The Emmy Awards were yesterday.  I didn’t watch that shit because I was too busy watching my Dallas Cowboys lose like a bunch of idiots.  *sigh*  But, pictures last forever so lets see who wore what at the Awards.  Hmm? (more…)

Of course, the reason Brett Michaels isn’t happy is that he was playing the Tony Awards.

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No wait, that’s not right.  I’m he was playing at the Tonys (why?) but he’s actually mad because he got the shit knocked outta him by a piece of staging.  No. Really.

BWAH-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA! (more…)